I put this down as day 1 but I am not going to necessarily update this every day. But today begins the journey.
I have been off for close to two weeks. I took two weeks of my vacation as a time to decompress before beginning this journey in earnest. I have, however, been reading and reflecting a good bit.
I have done some odd reading, to be sure. I read Mary Johnson’s An Unquenchable Thirst, which is the story of her 20 years as a Missionary of Charity. This is the religious order of nuns founded by Mother Teresa. Johnson’s journey was difficult and she left after 20 years for a whole host of reasons. She does not view Mother Teresa in an unkind light by any stretch of the imagination. There were times Johnson was frustrated, but she’s pretty honest that this is her frustration more than anything else. Still in all, the book sadly concludes with her pretty much losing her faith. It reminded me of Through the Narrow Gate by Karen Armstrong. Armstrong began a long journey away from faith and has found herself a believer, again. Interesting book, to say the least.
I am currently reading Joan Chittister’s book, The Rule of Benedict: A Spirituality for the 21st Century which is very much a part of my Sabbatical plan. I’m also reading the book entitled, An Infinity of Little Hours: Five Young Men and Their Trial of Faith in the Western World’s Most Austere Monastic Order. This book was written by Nancy Klein Maguire and is the journey of give young monks in a Carthusian Charterhouse (a type of monastery) in England in the early 1960’s. A Charterhouse type of monastery is a monastery that is really a collection of hermitages. Carthusian monks are hermits who live in their own cells, but all under one roof. They speak very, very little and their lives are austere. Under my spiritual director here, I have watched the first half of a very fascinating movie, Into Great Silence. The movie is set at the Charterhouse in France and is fascinating. I haven’t seen the entire movie as of yet, but it is essentially a slice of life with the Carthusians. It is visually amazing, but it’s a documentary and has virtually no speaking.
I am not a monk and will never been a monk so one might ask why this fascination with all things monastic. The answer is very simple. I am on a journey of grounding myself to my faith in some new and significant ways. Being raised Roman Catholic and educated in Roman Catholic seminaries, I find myself spiritually nurtured by much the Roman Catholic Church has to offer in terms of prayer. I live the Liturgy of the Hours. I was never big into Marian devotion and so I do not venture there. As for the Mass, again, that’s not something that really appeals to me. Frankly, if it is a banquet that I’m invited to attend, but not invited to partake in the meal, I have little interest in that.
I realized this the other day. I went to the Noon Mass at a church in Louisville staffed by Dominican priests. I came close to joining the Dominicans many years ago and have always appreciated their intellect and their preaching. I went to Mass in the hopes of hearing a good sermon. I had never heard a bad Dominican sermon before. On Wednesday, however, that streak was broken. His theology was, at least in my mind, shallow and the sermon was really a bunch of pious platitudes. Furthermore, the blissful silence I was enjoying was broken by the rosary recited by the whole congregation. I’m not Roman Catholic and haven’t been for a long time. It had been years since I attended a Mass and the experience was not all that wonderful. Oh, and the responses that were changed. Ugh. What a mess.
I am a United Church of Christ minister and I love my denomination a great deal. The older I get, the more I appreciate the family of faith I have chosen to be a part of. This journey is reminding my and nurturing part of where I am from; and affirming where I am now.
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